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Michael Green's 'How To' Forum
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How To Forum
Re: I Need A Friend...
Posted By: Samuel L Freedom In Response To: Re: I Need A Friend... (~S~)
Date: Saturday, 27 December 2003, at 6:46 p.m.
> Aloha Sam ~
> Let me see if I follow your thinking.....
> Ah, but there are never really any accidents! The same as there are no
> coincidences.There may be no coincidences such as 'its no coincidence that you had an accident because you weren't paying proper attention.', but there are accidents.
> Now you may 'perceive' those things as accidents or coincidences.
The ol' 'its just that your perception is faulty' routine. The sounds of self-righteousness ring deliciously in my ear.
> I think anybody that reaches out on Christmas Day for a friend deserves
> one....Ok, let him reach UP for the best friend a guy can have, and not on the internet where accidents abound. This is an information "highway", it is not good to look for friends on a highway...an anonymous highway at that.
> Did you ever stop to think that if serial killers had some real friends
> they might not be serial killers???Yes, I did stop to think about that. And you just wrote off god knows how manhy people who were serial killers fine friends. Since you love cliches and unverifiable phraseology as the (least reliable) way of proving your point, how about "You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink." People can be friends to a serial killer but that doesn't mean the killer is going to take advantage of the offer. They have bigger fish to fry. Do a little 'early development' studying and knock off the wounded bird syndrome stuff. All of this superficial goodness stems from something that happened to you early on.
> Hmmm....didn't you expect to put those pounds back on when you were
> gorging yourself after being on that diet where you 'thought' you were
> depriving yourself constantly???No, it happens so slowly...a person just eats a piece of cheesecakse and says, 'just this one' and then I'll be good. Then the next day, they have another and say, 'ok, two days isnt so bad, I'll get back on track tomorrow'. Then tomorrow comes, requiring more fierce justifying....eventually, you're 30lbs heavier and trying make friends with, and heal, twizted people on the internet. It happens just like that.
> Oh yes! They did expect it to fall to ruins!
Yes, I'll bet you made a serious inquiry into this and studied it diligently. Or maybe you just assumed it all based on a very limited experience that helps soften the blow of your own difficulties.
> They let those "this
> marriage is not right for me" thoughts overpower the ones they should
> have had of caring for each other through thick and thin. Their most
> powerful and repetitive thoughts brought them to divorce!So maybe there's two people in us, huh? One that expects the best and one that expects the worst and the result comes from whomever wins the battle.
> Ah, yes they did in the beginning. But, somewhere along the line they let
> discouragement take over. Had they held out, pressed on, stayed the
> course, then they would have found success right around the corner.This is an oversimplification masquerading as knowledge and is meant to hide the fact that you never really think deeply on these issues. It's obvious to anyone who picks their face up from their plate that something happened to discourage one or both participants, but what you're ignoring is that they began with high expectations, and ended up with the lowest. Now instead of stating the obvious and oversimplifying ideas that require diligent effort in thinking to refine, tell me what you know about this process of going from high to low expectations, ending up with the complete opposite result that one sets out expecting. Instead of telling me there's a turning point, which is obvious as day, tell what you know about this turning point...how to anticipate it properly and apply the necessary innoculation in advance of it's arrival.
> Success is elusive. You can't just have a 'wish'bone; you have got to have
> 'back'bone.Everything you've said so far comes in the form of some totally unverifiable vague and oversimplified statements. You can't be successfuly reasoned with because you firmly believe in those vague statements and speak them as if others should believe them, too. Then it becomes you against the ignorant masses who just don't get that their miserable lives are miserable and only you and a handful of others who think like you know why.
> So, you DO understand! Many people don't....that's when they need a friend
> to help them find that understanding.Difference between friendship and codepedence. You're language is that of a rescuer.
> Probably not!
> Yes, I did expect reaction like this....I am after all a reader of this
> forum and a member of the human race (at least last time I checked I was
> still here :)I have trouble listening to your kind of thinking. It's lazy, masochistic and one step shy of turning sadistic. In some circles they call it 'victim mindset'.
> Good suggestion! But remember what caused the 'rift' in the friendship in
> the first place. Don't repeat the same mistakes or you WILL have the same
> results. Relationships as all things must change and we change with them.You are hereby forbidden from watching Oprah ever again.
> ....smiling over here!
> Po maika`i (Blessings) ~S~
Good luck! Let us know when something bad happens so we can recite your own words back to you. That should make you feel better.
So go ahead, be friends with Twizted, and maybe because I am playing 'the bad guy' it will have a basis for working out--namely, to prove me wrong. lol
Happy New Year, po alua mika kaia (did I make a word other than po?)
Sam
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